My own personal envies and jealousies around autism and disability.

youneedacat:

A continuation of this post, which you might want to read before continuing.  This post is very long and very involved and may not make sense without the context of the last post.  Most especially, the stuff about “Please don’t have your usual knee-jerk responses to confessions of envy in this context.  We all know our envy is illogical and probably unfounded in reality and potentially harmful to others.  We’re just trying to bring it into the light where people can see it and maybe exorcise it a bit.  Also there’s a tl;dr at the end because this post is monstrously long.

Note: If you’re a member of my family, you probably don’t want to read this.  I’m serious.  I’m trying to be honest about my feelings of jealousy, and some of it revolves around family issues that none of us need to be stressing out about right now.  I don’t blame anyone for anything that’s happened, but things have happened, and so I have these feelings, and I’m trying to be honest about them in the interest of a conversation that’s going on about disability and jealousy/envy.  So if you read this, please don’t try to talk to me about it.  And it’d be better if you didn’t read it at all, maybe.  It’s not that bad, but I know emotions are high right now with the family emergencies and stuff, so I just wanted to put this warning here.  This post isn’t meant for family, and it could hurt feelings unnecessarily.

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On bus so can’t write lots now but here are a few of mine:

- similar to you: envy of people diagnosed accurately in early childhood. I know this makes little sense given the era in which I grew up (in the early 1980s) and the fact that girl-children were apt to be labeled in other ways, especially if we had any speech at all, but still.

- people who have less useful speech than I do. I can usually make words but it hurts after a while, and in all but a few very limited contexts, speech feels unnatural and I wish I didn’t feel so “obligated” to use it. I actually found it oddly relaxing last time I had laryngitis from a cold, because it meant I didn’t HAVE to talk and nobody questioned it or tried to pressure me. But I feel like a complete weirdo admitting that.

"I do believe in an everyday sort of magic—the inexplicable connectedness we sometimes experience with places, people, works of art and the like; the eerie appropriateness of moments of synchronicity; the whispered voice, the hidden presence, when we think we’re alone."

 Charles de Lint (via apoetreflects)

:D

(Source: jaegerjaques, via plures)

chavisory:

rise-of-mysterion:

Every single person who’s replied to my autism has had “autistic” in their about me section. 

I don’t understand. I’ve never understood that. Why do you want to be defined like that? Why do you want people to know that first instead of what kind of movies you like, or what songs you listen to, or something that’s actually relevant to your personality? Autism is a part of your identity, but it isn’t your identity. 

…because there’s nothing wrong with being autistic, and there’s nothing wrong with being okay with it, and because a lot of people use Tumblr for the purpose of connecting with other autistic people, so being able to easily identify each other is useful?

Because it is, in some ways, kind of a definitional experience?

I dunno, why are you telling other people what their identity is and isn’t and how they should and shouldn’t want to be defined?

IMO, making a point of *not* mentioning I’m autistic (presuming I wasn’t avoiding the subject for safety reasons) would be as weird as making a point of never bringing up the fact that I’m from Connecticut. No, being from CT doesn’t define me *in and of itself* as a person, but it certainly did a heck of a lot to shape my initial impressions of being alive and it’s not something I can ever “remove” from myself. If *other* people want to use my birth state OR my neurotype OR any other single characteristic I have to define me, I figure that’s their problem, not mine.

lissycposts:

Andy Goldsworthy’s art

sunnyinwisconsin:

colossaltitan:

calypso53:

one of my favorite things about hiking is when i come across a strange structure deep in the woods and am left to wonder how and why and when



That looks like an Andy Goldsworthy project!

sunnyinwisconsin:

colossaltitan:

calypso53:

one of my favorite things about hiking is when i come across a strange structure deep in the woods and am left to wonder how and why and when

That looks like an Andy Goldsworthy project!

(Source: deadlords, via chavisory)

(Source: miamivice88, via youneedacat)

heartvice:

pr1nceshawn:

Shocking Truths Behind What Cat Behaviors Really Mean…

(via youneedacat)

soilrockslove:

sourcedumal:

hobbitdragon:

crotchetybushtit:

usually unpopular opinion puffin pisses me off but this is so important

yes this

ALL OF THIS

Same here!
(Image is a picture of a puffin with words saying “I would rather have a thousand lazy bums living off my tax dollars than let a single poverty-stricken family go without food or shelter.”.)

Truth! I am fine paying taxes whenever I am employed. It’s like how else do we get a civilization anyway?

soilrockslove:

sourcedumal:

hobbitdragon:

crotchetybushtit:

usually unpopular opinion puffin pisses me off but this is so important

yes this

ALL OF THIS

Same here!

(Image is a picture of a puffin with words saying “I would rather have a thousand lazy bums living off my tax dollars than let a single poverty-stricken family go without food or shelter.”.)

Truth! I am fine paying taxes whenever I am employed. It’s like how else do we get a civilization anyway?

(Source: wildreservations, via youneedacat)

outdoormagic:

The Church Door at Stow on the Wold, Cotswolds, England (G) by Fragga on Flickr.


!! That is amazing.

comic-chick:

She got hit by a motherfucking bus and was bedridden for months but she didn’t let it get her down, she had an easel set up at just the right angle so that she could still paint in her hospital bed. And when her shitstain of a husband cheated on her with her own sister, Cristina, she took on her own female lover. VIVA LA FRIDA!

(Source: theskiesabovelife, via youneedacat)